I Tried to Buy My Own Private Idaho, But I Couldn't Get a Subprime Loan

Idaho Falls is a pleasant town with extremely friendly citizens who aren't afraid to approach strangers with a smile and a conversation. If it weren't for the significantly smaller sky, I'd swear I was still in Montana.

Paul and Jennifer approach me outside of the Starbucks where Jennifer works (one of two jobs she maintains). They are interested in the van (apparently most vans in Idaho are not covered in philosophical signatures) and talk briefly with me about what is important in their lives.

Jennifer signs Martin "Van" Buren with a quote, which means it's time to play my favorite new blog game, "Name the Dead Person Who Said It." (It's a working title.)

Here's how we play: I give you the quote someone wrote on the van, and you guess which dead person said it a long time ago. It's basically like those pop-up ads you see all over the internet, except I'm not telling you that you're the 10,000th person to view this site in flashing letters and guessing correctly will not entitle you to a coupon for a free appetizer at Chili's.

Name the dead person who said...

"No one can make you feel inferior without your permission."

Was it:

A) Jean-Paul Sartre

B) Eleanor Roosevelt

C) Ralph Nader

If you said B) Eleanor Roosevelt, you are correct and, even though you've won no coupon, should treat yourself to a nice appetizer at Chili's anyway. Why not? It's time you did something for you.

If you said C) Ralph Nader, you should know that not only is Nader not dead (well, maybe a little dead inside), he's actually running for president again. Isn't that adorable?

Back in Idaho Falls, I discover that speaking outside at night is not an easy task, and the cold air cuts my conversation with Paul and Jennifer short.

Paul, however, takes the time to email me with his thoughts on life's meaning.

"It really peeks my interest when I see people 'looking for life's meaning' because it reminds me so much of how I was. Coming out of high school, having a baby and going to college changed me forever..." he writes.

"The meaning of life is whatever Gods will for me and my life is. I also believe that this holds true in everyone else's life as well... That's it in a 'nut-shell!' I lean more towards the Calvinistic view that we are predestined to a certain extent because that's what Gods Word says. Since He is omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent this is the ONLY logical way that things can be in my eyes..."

Paul has spent a lot of time researching Christian apologetics and is very steadfast in his beliefs. He is also very open to debate and the exchange of ideas on religion, which I find to be a refreshing attitude. I may not agree with everything Paul believes, but I certainly respect his opinion. Which is why I have decided to take him up on a challenge he presented in his email.

"Please don't forget to mention something good about Starbucks in your study. Like all the other things we Americans build up and then try and tear down, Microsoft and Jennifer Aniston come to mind for me here as well, Starbucks is no exception. There's a lot of negative press for some very "giving" companies out there and it's just plain not fair."

I'm not exactly the most corporate friendly blogger in the world-wide-web, but with all the time I spend utilizing Starbucks' wireless internet and electricity, I probably do owe them a little bit of positive press. So tomorrow I will write about all of the wonderful things Starbucks has brought to the United States of America, working fervently to keep my tongue out of my cheek as I do so.

Other blog topics for the next week will include, but not be limited to late-night hitchhiking, tips on how to quit being an @$$hole, and Mormon vandalism.