A Smashing Good Time

While transitioning from Vegas to Lake Mead, I stop in the middle of the desert to admire a breathtaking red stone formation. After setting up the camera, I spot a group of tourists by a large gold van, worried looks on their faces.

"Is everything alright?" I ask.

"Not really," responds a woman in a proper British accent. "We've locked the keys in our van."

There are five of them, visiting the United States from Andover in Great Britain. They are comprised of two school teachers and their combined three teenage to college-age sons.

"We're so lucky you're here. I thought we were going to die out here in the middle of nowhere."

Hey, if you're going to get locked out of your car in the desert, it doesn't hurt to run into a guy with a house on wheels. After all, I have the tools to...to...What can we do?

"I could smash a window," one of them suggests.

"Yeah, but then you'd have a smashed window."

"Well, it's a rental."

"Did you get the insurance?"

"We did."

"What are you waiting for then?"

Thanks to my high-tech innovations, we pass on rocks and pick my car jack as the tool of choice. There is something particularly enjoyable about watching someone with a proper British accent smash something. It is decidedly entertaining.

I make sure to get the window smashing on camera.

Afterwards, we clean up the glass with a small broom and dust handle I keep in the back. It is not a particularly pleasant clean-up, but necessary. Lake Mead has many signs posted that say:

"No littering. Maximum penalty $5000 fine and/or up to six months in prison."

I bet "I'm a litterbug" would be an unacceptable response to the "why are you here" question in the joint, especially nowadays when even convicts pride themselves on being "green."

I get an interview with the Brits. They are a lighthearted, enjoyable bunch, and they are happy to have a chance to be on film.

"And to think," says one of the boys, "I thought today was going to be boring."

"I thought today was boring," offers his friend.

Nothing like car troubles to brighten your day. I thank the Brits and send them on their way. Smiling, I pack my van back up, hop into the driver's seat, pop the keys into the ignition and...

Nothing.

I'm really getting tired of my van breaking down in the worst possible situations.

Shaking my head and wiping the sweat from my brow, I resign myself to waiting in the middle of the desert until my van decides to start working again.

If it decides to start working again.