High School Sharpie Wisdom, Part I

One of my high school English teachers recently stumbled upon my book. One of her students, who happens to be the younger brother of a friend of mine, was reading it at school and asked her if she knew me.

So she read the book and not only did she resist the urge to grade it with a red-ink pen, she asked me to speak to her classes. With my cousin getting married in my hometown of Phoenix, I planned to stop through anyway. So I accepted.

Six classes of students at Sandra Day O'Connor High School were forced to sit in a room for hours at a time listening to me tell stories about traveling the country in my van, living homeless in Vegas, and working for the immortal Gene Simmons. I also worked in some anti-drug stories in order to stay compliant with the law requiring all high school guest speakers to speak out against drugs.

Surprisingly enough, the students seemed to enjoy themselves, even if each class period was just me talking for an hour. The last two classes even went out to sign the van, which will be the focus of a three part high school edition of "Sharpie Wisdom."

These are actual signatures from real high school students. No actors were involved and, as far as I know, no animals were hurt in the process:

How many Robert Frost quotes do you have on your vehicle? Because I've got two and counting on my van. Jealous much? It is interesting to note that when Frost originally wrote this, he used two hearts but only one smiley face.

This was my first Joni Mitchell quote, and I must say I'm impressed. I was worried that I'd get quotes like:

"Lollipop
Must mistake me, you're the sucker
To think that I
Would be a victim, not another"
-Britney Spears

Maybe our high school students have better taste than we give them credit for.




This sounds like a really wise quote, so I checked to see who said it.

It is most commonly attributed to the film The Princess Diaries.

To quote Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say about that."



This was one student's response to a joke I made about George W. Bush as well as my claim that the Monkees were far more sophisticated musicians than the Beatles.

For the record, I was being sarcastic. The Beatles were much better than the Monkees could ever hope to be.

I stand by the Bush joke.

Who cares?

I'll be back tomorrow with more wisdom from America's future.